My beautiful and no-doubt-about-it-pregnant wife is 28 weeks along now, and she looks absolutely incredible. I adore her pregnancy waddle, I love when she rubs her belly subconsciously, and she really is absolutely glowing. Pregnancy looks great on her.
With that said, some people just don’t think before they speak. I’m sure their little comments are well-intentioned, but they really aren’t helping anyone. Instead of calling my wife cute, you basically made her feel huge. So thanks for that.
So, without further adieu, here are 5 things to NEVER say to a pregnant woman.
1) “Wow! You look like you’re about ready to pop!” Oh really, sir? She does? She still has 12 weeks to go, she looks wonderful, and all you accomplished was making her feel huge. So shut up. Please.
2) “Are you sure there aren’t twins in there?!” Nope, just one. Promise. And by the way, you’re absolutely hilarious. In your head I’m sure you saw that joke going marvelously, but it didn’t. It doesn’t. And it never will.
3) “Should you be eating that?” Danger. Ohhh danger. Unless you want a fork to be thrust into your eyeball, I highly suggest you make exactly zero comments about what a pregnant woman eats. I don’t care if she is knee deep in a kiddy pool of chocolate, let her do whatever she wants. And, call this tip 3.1 – when she declines to eat something because modern medicine has determined it’s probably better that she doesn’t, don’t try saying “OH IT’LL BE FINE! Back in my day we used to…” Just stop it. Medicine has progressed significantly and new information shows that certain things aren’t stellar for the baby. So stop.
4) “My parenting style is the best and here’s why…” Listen up hot shot, nobody is a perfect parent. Do my wife and I know what we’re doing in the parenting department? Absolutely not. Are we going to have some rude awakenings, both literally and figuratively? Without a question. It’s a learning process, one that we are going to have to go through, but one thing is absolutely unequivocally without question, and that is the fact that our little daughter will be tremendously loved. Unless we asked for your input, please, keep your mouth shut. I don’t want or need to hear about why your baby yoga 10 times a week makes you a better parent than someone else.
5) “Are you going back to work after the baby comes?” This question is so absurdly loaded, it’s ridiculous. I know that it seems perfectly harmless on the surface, but what this question can imply, depending on who’s asking, is a sense of judgment. Either you’re a terrible mom for wanting to leave your baby and go back to work or you’re “outdated and old fashioned” for wanting to stay home. Sure, the question might be harmless and the conversation might be smooth and a-okay, but if you ask that question and follow up with any sort of judgement whatsoever, you could cause quite a bit of damage.
So, long story short, just don’t with these questions or comments. They’re typically loaded or full of ignorance, and don’t really accomplish much more than added stress and frustration to a woman already doing the hardest job out there – pregnancy.